TP5: Kippei and Shinji

[shattermelt]

Kippei spent a couple of long days checking on all the evacuees who might be his responsibility, attempting to determine that all of them had in fact, gotten out, and stubbornly refusing to allow himself to check on the whereabouts of Ibu Shinji until every other Fudomine resident who might have been affected by the order had been accounted for.

When he finally allowed himself to look, he realized that he really had no idea where Shinji might be found, whether he had been involved in trying to fix the problem or possibly been hurt when the breach itself had been discovered. Kippei had no idea, though he suspected that even if Shinji had been hurt he would still be in there helping to fix it or clean up or whatever else needed doing.

All that area was quarantined, however, and even ambassadors were not being allowed inside. At this point, Kippei did not care--after finding that no one he asked knew where Shinji was or how he was or had a contact number for him, and having ascertained that he was at least, not in medlab, Kippei reminded himself that Sada would need to know exactly what happened to her brother--never mind what he himself wanted, since that, he felt, was irrelevant.

Only mechanics and engineers and station security were being allowed into Grey and Brown sectors at the moment, which meant only their clearances were working on the access points. Kippei found a low-ranking member of security who probably would not be missed too soon, knocked him out from behind and searched his pockets. Unethical, illegal, and possibly stupid, but oh well. He wrapped a hooded cloak around himself in vague disguise, and headed into Grey to look for Shinji.

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[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei took a minute to center himself after he finished putting the kit away, standing in front of the cabinet and staring at nothing, still a little startled by his unconscious action, and hating the streak of weakness that wanted to do it again and again, and a lot of other things too. To curl up on the couch with Shinji and hold him as if he were Sada, and stroke that fresh clean hair in soothing comfort and also, he had to admit, just because he freaking wanted to.

He rested his forehead against the cabinet door and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. He was going to go out there and make sure that Shinji had a comfortable place to sleep and told himself sternly that it wasn't going to hurt him to just leave Shinji there and walk out of room, to go back to his own bedroom and sleep there. He didn't want or need anything from Shinji, and he repeated that to himself like a mantra as he went back and began mechanically to sort out the couch. I don't need you, I don't want you, I don't care. I don't need you I don't want you I don't CARE. And it was more and more obviously a lie each time he thought it, and eventually he gave up and stopped thinking, but he was silent with an aching sensation in his chest, and he couldn't help watching Shinji's slight form, swallowed up in the borrowed clothing as he moved around the room.

A faint ghost of a smile with a tinge of bitter wryness crossed his face--he was reminded of the very early days when Sada had been rescued, before they had found her properly fitting clothing either. But this was so different, even if he still had the same, or nearly the same random confusing urge to wrap a smaller person up and hold them close and safe against his chest. It hurts, he noted vaguely, a clinical analysis of his own reaction to seeing either one of these siblings looking war torn and weary and with no one but himself with his brusque and clumsy efforts at caring for them, himself who was manifestly inadequate to provide any sort of comfort.

"Do you want to call her?" he heard himself asking abruptly, a question born perhaps out of the vague thought that they might take better care of each other than he ever had of either of them.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Looking over his shoulder, and wondering if he was going to spend the next twelve hours being startled, Shinji shook his head slowly, putting the glass down and wandering back to the couch, hiking the pants up as he went. It was going to be damn embarassing if they just slipped right off his hips, but he didnt want to do the drawstring up any further or it would bunch on his hips uncomfortably and he had to sleep in these clothes so...Tachibana was just going to have to deal with a little skin.

"She doesn't need to know," he said softly. "I'll call her in a few days." When he didn't have any evidence of being fried by a nuclea reactor. He looked at Tachibana carefully, feeling guilty yet again because the guy was so obviously uncomfortable with him being there. He reached over and gently took the sheet out of his hand, making up the rest of the bed himself in a few quick jerks. Something occurred to him then.

"Do you want to?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Well and truly shocked out of his distraction with that little bit of skin that showed as Shinji adjusted his pants, Kippei just stared at him for a minute, a bit wonderingly. Did he want to?

"I...not yet," he answered haltingly, completely thrown off balance by the gesture, as if Shinji was admitting to recognizing that Kippei saw her as a sister too, and might want to contact her. He'd been half convinced that Shinji resented that about him, and here he was easily offering to share, or so it seemed. Kippei didnt know what to think. "You're right," he agreed mechanically, "she doesnt have to know yet."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Blinking, thinking it was rather like Tachibana Kippei's brain just flew out the window, Shinji tossed the blanket over the couch and sat at the head, pulling the pillow into his lap and just watching Tachibana. He was interesting to watch, when you got past the whole 'he hates my guts' thing. And he was still sexy as hell, if untouchable. Also, Shinji was almost positive that was the first thing Tachibana had ever agreed with him about without sounding like someone was trying to tear teeth out of his mouth. He must really like Sada after all. Shinji wondered if he was just waiting for Sada to get old enough to marry and frowned.

"You know, if you want to marry Sada, you better be prepared for a hellishly long engagement. And I'll buy her a damn chastity belt if I have to just to make sure its as long as its meant to be."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei just stared at him. "I don't want to marry her," he growled irritably, and almost bit his tongue out in annoyance at what he had just admitted. Marrying, wtf? He'd never considered the idea of marrying anybody, and yet he'd just as much as admitted that it wasn't Sada but her brother that he'd want if he did. God, he was fucked. Shinji must think he was insane. Kippei wasn't too sure he was wrong.

"Go to bed," he said gruffly, shaking his head as he waited for Shinji to do just that before he left the room. Hell, he would leave right this minute to sort out his confusion in private, but part of him stubbornly refused to do so until he saw Shinji safely tucked away for some much needed rest.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji just stared. What the hell was that meant to mean? Was the guy engaged? Betrothed? Was that why he seemed to have such a stick up his arse? He could have just said so! Shrugging, and a little peeved at once again being told what to do, Shinji nonetheless pulled the sheet and blanket once and slid in, still looking at Tachibana, who was..looking back. This was so weird. Did he want him to have nightmares of an angry Ambassador kicking him down the hall in the middle of the night or what? Asking for his burn cream back and skinning him when he said it had sunk in already? Okay...that one was gross already and he hadn't even dreamt it yet.

He decided the best option was to fake sleep, so he settled in as if he fully intended to do so.

"Good night, Tachibana-san."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei didn't answer, too disturbed and confused and angry at himself to respond. He leaned down without really thinking about it to tuck the blankets in more securely around Shinji's slender frame, making sure he was well covered, studying him with an expression that was torn between bemusement and annoyance and a kind of wistful tenderness, his eyes full of troubled questions as he stood for a moment just looking down at him, meeting the dark eyes looking back without really being aware of what he was doing, too caught up in the chaos in his head to realize that he was showing a great many things rather too openly, even if they were barely visible.

"Goodnight," he said softly, followed by an equally quiet command to turn off the lights, and in the darkness his hand almost lingered on Shinji's head for a moment, but drew back without quite touching as he turned away and left the room. Jesus, he was going to die. Rikkai wasn't going to kill him. Shinji was.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

What the hell...he was tucking him in. Shinji just stared at those hands, fascinated and more than a little dumbfounded. What the hell was Tachibana Kippei, who hated his guts doing tucking him in, unless he didn't in fact...hate his guts. Shinji looked up, startled and trying not to show it, meeting dark eyes a little questioningly and shocked at the odd look on Tachibana's face.

It was the face Shinji always dreamed of living next to, and it was stuck on that hellishly sexy body. Besmused, annoyed, wistful...caring. Almost tender. And it was asking him questions Shinji didn't think were possible. He waited until it was dark and he heard Tachibana's door shut and he sat up, looking over the top of the couch at Tachibana's bedroom door. Who the hell...

Tachibana Kippei was the most confusing bastard to ever live. Hands down.