oob: kippei, ashi, and shinji

[shattermelt]

Kippei had been serious about going to see Ashi--Shinji was obviously not ready for that yet, and it was probably going to be awhile before he was, and Kippei felt that if she couldn't have one brother, albeit the one she wanted, she should at least have another.

He wasn't sure when he'd decided that she was his responsibility to a point, but he did feel responsible for this, maybe because he'd started it. He'd been the one to say, bring her home, and he still believed it had been the right thing, but he'd hoped that it wouldn't take this long to sort out. At least Shinji seemed to be making progress, and he hadn't completely shut down so Kippei was still hoping that things would be okay, eventually.

But he decided to go see her and let her know what was going on and maybe just spend a little time with her, to make up for it all--if she wanted him to. He was only a substitute and he knew it, but she deserved to have whatever he could give her. And hanging out with her and Sada for awhile was hardly going to be difficult. Kippei loved them both, and they were good company. He headed over to the Ibu house for the afternoon, and in spite of himself felt slightly nervous when he knocked on the door.

Comments

[teagoblin.livejournal.com]

"I'll get it!" Ashi bolted for the door on socked feet, sliding the last few metres and squealing as a little blue haired monster somehow got between her and the door. Not ready to give up the battle to be the one who opened the door and broke the slight boredom, or at least made it a little more interesting, Ashi grabbed the doorhandle around Sada's hands and the yanked it open together. Sada stumbled forward, straight into someone's knees with a disgruntled whine as she rubbed her head. Sada looked up and her eyes went wide a moment before a delighted grin broke out on her face.

"He's mine." My visitor; not Sada's, or Dad's, or anyone else's, she decided immediately. She reached out and snatched up his hand before Sada could say anything. "My visitor!"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei blinked and then he chuckled, squeezing her hand and reaching out to ruffle Sada's hair. "Yeah, yours," he agreed, amused by the decisive tone in her voice. He was a little surprised, but pleased that she was so glad to see him. At least he had been right, and a visit from him might do some good in the meantime.

[teagoblin.livejournal.com]

Ashi blinked a little, not having expected him to agree with her, but it just made her that much more pleased to see him. When he squeezed her fingers she felt like melting happily into the floor. She tugged on his hand as Sada righted herself and started trying to snatch his other hand, a determined glint in her eye that made Ashi stick her tongue out at the little brat. I win.

"Did you really come to see me? Does that mean you're going to stay and play for a while? Can we play sleeping beauty? I'll sleep, you be the prince..."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei laughed. "Mostly you," he told her. He moved further into the house, closing the door behind them and letting Sada catch his other hand. "It's fine if you want to share, but I came to see how you were doing."

He was slightly alarmed by the word 'play'... he was pretty sure he'd never done anything like her definition of that. The following scenario only made him more certain. Probably his sister had dragged him into those kind of pretend games when she was younger, but she'd grown out of it and he didn't really remember them. It had been a really long time. "I'll stay for awhile," he said awkwardly, "but I don't know how good I am at playing."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Mmm...I suppose we can do something you actually like doing," Ashi eyed him skeptically, not sure there was anything other than tennis that Tachibana-san actually liked. Weirdo. Cute weirdo though. And he was good at tennis, so whatever.

Sada yanked on Kippei's hand, determined to get his attention, not liking how Ashi was stealing him all for herself at all.

"She wants to share, she really does!"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei tilted his head at Sada, smiling with his eyes. "Does she?" He looked back at Ashi, giving her a reassuring glance. "Only if she wants to, this time," he told Sada. "I'll come see just you sometime, okay?"

He wondered about the wisdom of that, since the last thing he wanted was to set up some kind of competition here, but he did want to talk to Ashi and for today, he wanted this to be for her.

"I've seen you lots of times when you didn't have to share," he reminded Sada, which wasn't entirely true since usually at least Shinji had been there too. But she'd never had to share him with a sister before, and he was pretty sure that was different. He didn't know how, but it seemed like it was.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Sada frowned darkly and stomped her foot, but Ashi was too busy staring at Kippei in a mix of adoration and disbelief to notice. Sada finally stomped off to the living room and the sounds of a disgruntled eight year old shoving a tape into a tape player were clearly audible, followed by a loud scream at the opening to a horror movie. Ashi just held on to Kippei's hand, as if it might suddenly be snatched away.

"Just for me? Really?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"Yeah," he answered, smiling a bit. "Just for you." He couldn't really explain why he wanted to, even needed to, but this young girl made him hurt inside for the things she had lost. The one thing he had, something, someone he would rather die than lose, and she'd lost him in such a painful way.

Kippei felt, somehow, as if he ought to be the one sharing, but you couldn't share someone else for them. Shinji was the only one who could decide that. He couldn't really give her Shinji back, not unless and until Shinji made that choice. But he would give her what he could.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Hmm...okay." That was pretty damn cool. No one had ever come just to see her, without her inviting them over and even then it was just friends from school. This was different. This was Shinji's boyfriend. This was someone who lived with Shinji and got to kiss him whenever he wanted...and Shinji got to kiss Kippei too. Ashi thought that was one of the coolest things ever. She tugged on the big warm hand wrapped around hers and headed for her room, excited but trying to act cool.

"I got to have Shinji's room! It still had lots of his stuff in it too and I shouldn't have gone through it all but I did. I didn't break anything though and there wasn't a diary or anything..." She bit her lip, suddenly worried he might get mad at her in Shinji's place. But it really hadn't been that much stuff.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei chuckled--actually he had no idea if Shinji would be upset about that (other than the fact that it was her, which would probably make him freak out, but there was no way Kippei was saying that to her), but he knew well enough that if it had been him, he wouldn't have been able to resist, either.

"Most of his stuff is at home," he pointed out, a kind of reassurance since she looked a bit worried. He felt warm inside at being able to say that. Home for him, home for Shinji, for Akira, it was there. They had a place of their own, just for them, and it was good, really really good to know that.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"...I thought so, since there was hardly anything there. He left some shirts...I want to wear them. Do you think I can? I havent asked Dad, because I don't want to make him upset or worried or anything, but I just think they're cool shirts..." And they were Shinji's. She pulled him into her room, which really hadn't changed much since it had been Shinji's and she didn't want to change anything. She sat on the edge of the bed, thinking.

"You...your house. Is it nice? I mean...do you like it?" Does Shinji?

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei nodded, silently remembering what Shinji had said about not bringing her home. Yeah, Shinji liked it. It was theirs, their safe place. Shinji's hiding place, sometimes, but still--theirs.

"I think it's okay if you wear them," he said, hoping Shinji wouldn't kill him for it when he found out. But if he'd left them behind for this long, it was hardly like he needed them anymore.

Kippei reached out to brush her hair back, and it wasn't at all like Shinji's or Sada's but it was still soft and made him smile down at her. It would be funny, if it wasn't so sad, how Shinji was so afraid of her.

"It's a nice house. I like it very much. You'll see it someday." Someday, someday it really was going to be okay.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

He liked it. That was good. Really good. Ashi blushed a little when he pushed her hair back, delighted by the feel of his warm fingers and feeling silly for the little flutter in her chest. She jumped up and rummaged around in the closet, pulling out the shirt she had been eyeing off all week and yanking it on over the one she was wearing, delighted by the layered effect, and the scent still lingering under the musty smell. She eyed the stains on the lower half of the sleeves and across the bottom oddly, fingers rubbing at them. On the dark brown shirt, they hardly showed up, but they were odd. Splattered over the shirt and just...weird. Cool looking. Rustic almost.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei sighed a little, wishing it had been that simple and suppressing another shiver.

"I'm fine," he answered. "Really. I just don't know how you drink that stuff every day," he teased, grinning faintly and nuzzling Shinji's cheek. That was only part of what had prompted the comment, but he wasn't going into the rest of it.

[teagoblin.livejournal.com]

"You're weird," Shinji agreed completely even though that wasn't what Kippei had said. Totally weird, but that was good because Shinji liked him that way. Still, Shinji untangled himself and took the drink bottle, putting it back in the fridge before coming back, pushing Kippei onto one of the stools, leaning his hands on Kippei's knees and staring him straight in the face before sighing explosively. He was hiding again. And he said Shinji was bad! Hmph.

"It's easy. You just swallow." He smirked, thinking of swallowing something else entirely.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei laughed, putting his arms around him and pulling him closer to rest their heads together. Easy enough, but that wasn't what he'd meant.

"I love you," he said instead of trying to explain, because that just covered everything. Loved everything about him, the way he smiled and the way he spoke and the way he tried so hard, always. The way he looked when he was happy and the way he knew when something was wrong, like now. Kippei could see the questions in his eyes. Shinji probably wouldn't ask, though. Kippei wasn't sure if he was glad or sorry. On the one hand... he wanted to ask, wanted to know, but on the other hand, he liked it when Shinji was happy and he didn't want to bring this up again, especially now.

[teagoblin.livejournal.com]

"Mmmm...." And that just made Shinji feel warm and fuzzy no matter how weird Kippei was being. He closed the little gap between them and kissed Kippei again, just enjoying the taste of him and the warmth trapped between them, and the silly, funny feeling he got whenever Kippei said that.

"I love you too," Shinji murmered around a smile. "But its really annoying when you and Aki run off places without telling me and then i do everything and then there's nothing left to do except sit here and drink Inui's weird juice and stare at the nice clean dishes. Well, actually, I was trying to learn a song but I dont really like that song I only wanted to learn it because it had a chord in it that I don't know very well yet and I wanted to see how you played it in a song, but I think I get it now and I still dont like the song so I dont think I want to learn it, which made me look at the dishes because I was bored."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei smiled and kissed his hair. So like Shinji.

"I'm sorry I was gone so long," he said. "I wasn't planning to be." Well, he'd meant to go and visit and hadn't expected Ashi to want him to stay so long, but he was glad that he had. It had been good for them both, he thought.

[teagoblin.livejournal.com]

'It's okay." And it was. "Because you're here now and I'm not bored anymore. It makes it worth being bored, because then I know how good it is to not be bored when you get home." He grinned a little at that and couldn't resist kissing him again. Kippei was just plain kissable. All the damn time. So was Aki, end of story.

"Was it boring where you were, without me?" Where were you?

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei grinned at that and had to kiss him again, taking the opportunity to slide his hands up the back of Shinji's shirt, just a little, and place them on his lower back--but then he went still, smile fading at the final question. Not boring, not at all, no.

He was silent for minute, controlling the desire to shiver and maybe pull away to hide the sudden shadow, the questions in his eyes. He didn't want to ask them, and yet he did. He wanted to know.

"I went to see your sisters," he said at last, stalling. He tried for a grin, but it came out wry and strained. "Boredom wasn't exactly an option."

[teagoblin.livejournal.com]

Laughter bubbled out of Shinji immediately, and then he realised Kippei's had said sisters, as in plural and the laughter died just as quickly as it had begun. No, boredom wasn't an option.

"She..." He frowned, trying to think and feeling like his head was suddenly made of saw dust, scratchy and stuffed full of wood. "She's living with them now?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei just nodded silently, studying Shinji's expression with watchful dark eyes.

"Yeah," he said softly at last. "She moved back home."

[teagoblin.livejournal.com]

Right. Because he didn't live there anymore, and it was her house now and she lived there and that was the way it should be. Of course. But there were only so many rooms in that house...the bedrooms. He tilted his head, thinking about it. There was a spare room...maybe...but he knew.

"She's in my room." He knew it, immediately. She used to always want to sleep in his room. She was sleeping in it now. Maybe right now. Maybe sitting on his bed. Maybe going through his things. He stared at Kippei's shirt, incredulous, watching his fingers bunch up in the material, completely unable to explain why it all upset him so much; why it mattered.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei wrapped his arms more tightly around him, holding him and brushing a kiss on his temple, wishing he knew some way to reassure him. But there really wasn't any way to make this better.

"She is," he agreed, and carefully did not tell Shinji that she'd gone through his things. Shinji obviously did not like the idea of her being in there at all. He wasn't quite sure what to say, and was more wary than ever of asking Shinji what he wanted to know.

[teagoblin.livejournal.com]

It should not have been such a big deal and Kippei was worrying about...everything, and that just wasn't fair, so Shinji forced himself to calm down. He pushed away the desire to march over there and demand she get out, that it was his and she wasn't welcome there. It wasn't his anymore; his home was here. He didn't need anything from there, and she did. This was better, or so he tried to tell himself.

"It's okay," he murmered softly to Kippei, trying to be reassurring. Trying not to worry him. "Was just...not expecting it. It's okay."