tp5 log: shinji goes home

[shattermelt]

Shinji was going home. Thank god! It wasn't that he didn't like staying at the Angel, or with Ina, far from it. But he hated being a burden on anyone, and Ina was completely supporting him and he didn't like that at all. So when he finally got the all clear from Ina too, he was delighted, to say the least. He could go home, and he could get to work on the new craft system. And he could buy his own food, and get dirty if he had to, and he could sleep on a weird schedule without anyone thinking he was weird, or being a bum or ...it was just better. To be at home, where no one could question anything he did. Yeah.

So he was going through his room at the Angel with a fine tooth comb to make sure he didn't leave a mess or forget anything so Ina wouldn't have to go all the way to his place just to return a comb or something. She had already done more than enough for him.

It was a little bit later than Kippei had planned on when he finally got to the Angel. He knew Shinji hadn't been expecting him early, but he had still hurried because he wanted to get there as soon as possible. He'd been restless and irritable all day, and consequently short with people, which wasn't all that different outwardly from his usual behavior, but he could feel the shortness of his temper and his difficulty in hanging on to it, and he knew it was because he just didn't want to be anywhere but there right now.

He allowed himself a small sigh of relief as he turned over the last few tasks of the day to his aide, and left to catch the shuttle to Brown. They were going to have to figure something else out, because this arrangement was just not cool. Living on opposite sides of the station was a pain in the arse.

Shinji stuffed the last thing he owned into his bag and went to say his thanks, hugging Ina like she was about to disappear, hard and wondfully and thanking her profusely before heading for...whatever was the quickest way to his place. There were several ways to get there, but he opted for a longer route, past the shuttle port, because it was cleaner and less likely anything could go wrong and hence he wouldn't be lectured beyond all recognition for it. Besides, Kippei still hadn't been yet and Shinji was holding onto the brief hope he still might get to see him tonight, and the only way that was going to happen was via the shuttle. So. That was the way.

Kippei almost missed him, not having expected to see Shinji here. The Angel was mercifully close to the shuttle entrance, and he was completely focused on getting there in as short a line as possible. It was only because of his usual habit of scanning his surroundings, no matter how distracted he was, noting everything even if he dismissed it immediately, that he saw Shinji at all. When he did he stopped in his tracks, taking a moment to abort his current mission and changing direction--Shinji had already seen him, as if he'd been looking for him. Kippei frowned cautiously as he approached.

"What are you doing?" he asked, and then he took in the fact that Shinji was holding his bag and it had been about a week now and... was he going home finally? An odd note of disappointment tangled with fierce elation inside of him, and Kippei forced himself to relax slightly, even as he looked around warily. Standing in the middle of a crowded shuttle port was not a place he felt comfortable letting his guard down. "Going home?" he asked, his voice softening in spite of himself.

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[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei looked at him sideways for a second and then quirked a wry grin. Or anything, huh?

"Come here," he answered, holding out his hand and beckoning with his fingers. He moved closer without waiting for an answer, hand still extended and waiting for Shinji to take it. His eyes glinted with something that was half mischief, and half very determined intention.

Come here and kiss me.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Well, that wasn't exactly the answer he was expecting, but Shinji still wanted to give Kippei whatever the hell it was he wanted, so he quickly drank the water he had poured himself and wandered over, taking Kippei's hand again, smiling a little at the warm fingers and as he got close enough he wound his arms around Kippei's waist, just enjoying holding onto him.

"And now? What do you want now?"

[ahael.livejournal.com]

Kippei didn't bother answering in words--Shinji looked a little confused, and he'd taken his time wandering over, but that didn't really matter because he was here and now he was exactly where Kippei wanted him. Kippei sighed with relief and curved one hand around the back of Shinji's neck, pulling him closer and Shinji had his head tipped up just perfectly; all Kippei had to do was lean down and kiss the hell out of him, and he did.

Now seemed like as good a time as any to give Shinji the kiss he should have had months ago, to kiss him back the way that he deserved. The way Kippei had been wanting to for what seemed like forever, the way he never had, the way that Shinji had kissed him that first time but more intense, more everything--deeper and longer and more fierce and sweet and hot, finally tasting as much as he wanted to, his tongue sliding against Shinji's and over the roof of his mouth, licking every surface and breathing him as if he were air. He was going to run out of oxygen in a minute, but that was the last thing he cared about right now.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Oh hell. It had been one thing to think maybe Kippei would kiss like this, and be denied and simply try to get over it. It was quite another thing to know he kissed like that. If Kippei decided he couldn't this, Shinji would never be able to forget that Tachibana kissed like this; just the way he had dreamt he would and it was the best kiss Shinji had ever had, and the only one he ever wanted again. His arms wrapped tighter, trying to pull Kippei closer still, as if to draw the tongue further into his mouth and that taste all the way inside him. Kippei tasted like the ground; something Shinji hadn't seen in years. He had to keep reminding himself to breathe through his nose, to make it last longer, to hold his breath just that much longer so this could last as long as possible. When at last he pulled away, just a tiny bit, he couldn't stop the grin from blooming.

"Oh. So that's what you wanted. You could have just said so."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei gave him a tiny quirk of a smile in response, settling both arms around him and holding on, finally almost relaxing.

"I said come here, what else did you think I wanted?" He looked amused. "You asked what, I said here, obvious answer is you." The answer is always you, but he couldn't say that.

His smile faded slightly and he studied Shinji for a moment, then looked around again, trying to imagine himself living here. Even better, living here with Shinji. It wasn't a bad place at all, even if it was small.

"So, this is it then," he murmured, and whether he meant the place or the time or something else entirely was less than clear.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji felt a pang of guilt again, as if he were trying to make Kippei come down to his level. He was suddenly very much aware of a huge gap in social status. It had never been overly important in Fudomine, but it was there, and it was glaringly obvious and if there was ever peace Shinji was sure it would become a much more obvious thing. And Tachibana Kippei would always be a Tachibana, and Shinji would always be an Ibu. The last one, as it turned out. Whatever. His little hole in the wall in Brown was not the place for a Tachibana; he had the place for a Tachibana, in Green, where he belonged. Where that couch was...

"Um....yeah. This is my place." Mine, and not yours. You wouldn't be at home here. You would try, but trying isnt enough sometimes.

"You know...you said your bed was more comfy than your couch, but you haven't proved it."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei nodded absently, thinking about it. He didn't like this whole arrangement, not really. He wanted...Shinji with him, all the time. Not just for a night or two now and then, but every night and every day too. And he didn't really care where--well, he did care, but not as much as he cared that Shinji was there. They could make it work, regardless. He sighed tensely, releasing Shinji and starting to pace restlessly around the room.

"Look, I don't want--I miss you. I'm tired of... this." He waved his hand vaguely, and shoved his fingers through his hair in frustration. Naturally when he wanted them, he couldn't find the words. "I'm tired of this right now. I want to be with you, where you are, I want you with me. You just got home and I'm not saying you should move. I don't know what you want. But I need... I need you closer. I don't want any of this back and forth, a night here and a night there and never all the time. So it's up to you." He stopped, turning to face Shinji with some apprehension and folding his arms, more to hold himself still than anything like a challenge.

"I'm staying here tonight," he informed Shinji. "After that, either I'm staying here, end of story, or you come home with me and we stay there. Your choice." He held his breath, waiting.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji wasn't sure when he had hit his head, but for a few long minutes he wa sure he had; he could have sworn Kippei just said that he wanted to live with him. Then, when the silence just kept getting longer, Shinji realised that Kippei had just invited him to live with him. Which was...unbelievable. Last time Shinji was in Kippei's place the guy had glared at him. Non stop. And acted like he was going to choke on his really yummy spaghetti if Shinji so much as considered sneezing. But...he had also denied wanting to marry Sada, and said something else instead that Shinji just hadn't noticed. So maybe the rest was just...not wanting to get used to what you couldn't have. Shinji understood that, a little more than he wished he did. Very slowly, Shinji looked around, and it took a bit, but he came to the conclusion he wasn't all that attached to the place, though he would keep it because he could store stuff in it. Like parts for the ship. And later, if it really did work, then...he could get rid of it.

"Okay. We can do that. Okay." He sounded like he was trying to convince someone and stopped, which gave him time to think about other things. "Wait..you said. You're staying? Here? Tonight? With me? In there?" He thought about his bed, remembered it being relatively clean bar the scattered machine parts lined up against the wall and he just hoped the sheets were clean and not covered in...grease. And once he had decided that he just smiled and nodded. "You're staying here tonight, with me." And damn that was surreal, but so. fucking. good.

"And then tomorrow we can go back to your place." For good. Oh god.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Shinji said okay. Kippei let out the breath he was holding in a huge exhalation of relief, and finally relaxed for real. He let his arms drop to his sides, tilting his head with a hint of a smile as Shinji went on. He nodded in answer to all the questions, slightly amused by Shinji's shock. He was staying, because he couldn't stand it anymore, and now that Shinji was home there was no reason not to.

"Yes," he sighed, coming over to wrap Shinji in his arms again, holding him as tightly as he dared. Yes and always yes. Nothing felt more right than this, nothing had ever been right like this before. He wondered vaguely why Shinji chose his place instead of his own--maybe it was the bed? He couldn't deny that he really, really wanted Shinji there. He wouldn't mind staying here, he could do that, but it was less than convenient. His place was bigger and more comfortable--sort of, in some ways--and it was his, and he liked the idea of Shinji in his space. Not that he would say that to Shinji.

"Thank you," he murmured, a bit stiffly, burying his face in Shinji's hair. Thank you for understanding, because I don't know anymore what I would do without you.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"mm....you dont need to thank me," Shinji murmered against Kippei's shoulder, wrapping him up in a warm hug and smiling against the material of his shirt. "I told you I like your couch and I want to see your bed, and when you see my bed you'll probably understand, and I promise I wont try to make anything in bed. I'll keep it all on a table or in a corner or something because...hmm...that can get really messy." No way was he making engine parts or the like in Kippei's bed. Hell no, he expected to make other things in that bed, preferably with Kippei.

"...'sides. I want to live somewhere I can get delivery!"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"You're not sleeping on the couch," Kippei grumbled, holding him tighter. The whole point, or at least half the point, was to sleep with Shinji, and it really defeated the purpose to have him sleeping on the couch. And yeah, it was a very nice couch, but Kippei wasn't entirely sure why Shinji liked it so much.

He looked down, a little startled, at the mention of making things in bed--the fact that Shinji took his projects to bed with him shouldn't really surprise him as much as it did.

"Messy?" he asked, curious now to see what Shinji's bed looked like. He wasn't entirely sure he'd mind if Shinji did bring his work to bed sometimes--Shinji was sexy when he was working. But it couldn't be very comfortable to sleep with engine parts in the bed.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Uh...wel...its greasy you know? And it makes a mess, and sometimes I just kinda crash and wake up hugging something like a teddy that just isnt soft and I regret it for days, but um...that's embarassing and I dont know why I told you that." It was funny though, thinking about being able to wake up with Kippei instead of a circuit board. Funny and damn cool.

"Mmm...I wont sleep on the couch," Shinji agreed, eyeing his own couch a little distastefully, since he already knew how damn uncomfortable it was to sleep on. "I'll sleep on you."

[flamesword.livejournal.com]

Kippei was smiling to himself, listening as he ran his fingers through Shinji's hair. He could just imagine Shinji waking up hugging something like that, probably with grease still streaking his hands and face, and it was oddly... cute. If he ever saw Shinji like that, he'd want to kiss him--not that this was much different from the usual.

"So what else do you have to do first?" he asked, and his voice was still soft and rumbly with amusement. It wasn't exactly late enough to go to bed, and if Shinji wanted to unpack or clean or something Kippei could try to help with that, but they'd spent an awful lot of time lately just laying on Shinji's bed at Inanna's, and he'd really rather just do that here, in Shinji's own bed.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Well..." Shinji thought about it, but other than pack, which could be done easily enough in the morning, as long as Kippei didn't have that much of an early start, or Shinji could even come back during the day to get anything he wanted, there wasn't really anything that had to be done. "...nothing, I guess. "First...before what?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

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