potg: shinji and kippei

[shattermelt]

When Kippei had the chance, he liked to take Shinji back to the hotel when he was leaving, so he could say goodbye. This time he'd made sure he said a nice, long goodbye in front of the hotel with as much kissing as he could manage in the last ten minutes, and then it was really time to go, so he pulled away reluctantly and stuffed his hands in his pockets to keep from reaching out again, looking over his shoulder as he finally walked away. Shinji was leaving and that always, always hurt.

Comments

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji glumly caught the lift to the top of the building and glared at the stupid gate. He hated this; hated that Kippei had to go to work and he wouldn't get to see him until he was allowed back in three days and...what did that sign say? Blinking, Shinji walked backward and stared, stunned.

Gate now open for approved Humans.

He looked from the gate to the sign and they had approved Kippei when he let them take Shinji back and oh god...Kippei could come, they didn't have to be separated at all! Shinji bolted for the door, ignoring the guy shouting at him and pointing wildly at his watch, ignoring the fact he had no damn idea where he was going, hitting the foyer at a run and barrelling into three people before he ran into the door, which fucking hurt damnit! He yanked the door open and panicked, having no idea where Kippei might be, and what if he had already left? No, no, no, no, no!

"KIPPEI!" He bellowed.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei had been walking very slowly, because it was hard, walking away from Shinji, even if Shinji was no longer there. Still, he was barely within earshot when Shinji yelled his name. He spun around in hope disbelief, wondering wildly if he was imagining things--but no, there was Shinji, waving like a madman and Kippei's feet didn't even give him a chance to think, he was running, all the way back to the door where Shinji was standing.

"What?" he asked breathlessly, suddenly a bit worried because what if there was a problem? What if Shinji was late and he was going to be sick because he couldn't go back on time? His heart thudded in his chest from more than just exertion, and he grabbed Shinji's arms carefully, trying to steady himself. "What happened?"

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji took deep breaths, heart slowly settling. Kippei. He wasn't too late; Kippei had heard and was here and it was going to be okay. It was alright. Kippei came back. He smiled so hard he was sure his face was going to break in two and his teeth ached but he couldn't stop for the world.

"You can come!" He exclaimed breathlessly. "Through the portal. You can come now!"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei stared at him. What? Portal? Okay, he knew vaguely that it was how Shinji got back to the angel world, whatever that was, but it had always a sort of nebulous...thing, that took his Shinji away. Kind of like a monster, only not. Monsters you could kill. He had less than no idea of what was on the other side, and had never really thought much about it beyond Shinji's descriptions of his life, which had been rather dissociated in his mind from the world they were in, as if Shinji were an existence unto himself and not part of something so incomprehensible.

And...what? Come? He could come? His brain came to a halt and froze. What the hell did that even mean? "What are you talking about?" he asked blankly.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"I mean you can come through the gate with me! They fixed it and it works both ways for both of us now! You can come home, we don't...I don't have to leave you here anymore, I can take you with me!" Shinji wrung his hands a little, thinking he was being pretty clear explaining it and not sure what else to say.

"Do you have to work, or something?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"I...don't..." Kippei just stared at him, utterly bemused. Go through the gate. As in, go to Shinji's world, see where he lived... see the other side. It seemed unreal.

"I, uh. I don't have to work." This was partly true. He was scheduled to work, but as much overtime as he'd pulled in the last few months, he could easily get away with calling in sick or something. "Are you sure I can come?" he asked finally, and looked down at himself rather stupidly. "I don't have any clothes..."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Borrow Kiriharas," Shinji said immediately. "Or anyone's. I beg if I have to, please say you'll come? You can come, I'm sure of it, the sign said so...wait...sign..." Shinji blinked and held up a hand near his face.

"Holy shit..." He squinted and pulled it closer and it was a blurry mess but sure enough, much like it had been when he first met Kippei, he could mildly see. He grinned broadly at Kippei. "You have to come!" Kippei was the only thing that made him better.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei blinked at him, not knowing who the hell Kirihara was or if he was anywhere near the right size; he doubted Shinji had thought of that.

"Look--" he started, worried, and then stopped again. "Okay, I'll come, just hurry the hell up, would you? You can't get stuck here!" And knowing Shinji, if he didn't come Shinji would just stand here arguing with him until exactly that happened.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"I won't get stuck here," Shinji mumbled, grabbing Kippei's hand and dragging him back inside the building and into the lift, buzzing with excitement. He wrapped his arms around Kippei's neck and kissed him hard, overwhelmed by the whole situation.

"I'm taking you hoooome with me!"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei kissed him back hard, not really able to absorb what was happening yet, but Shinji was real and solid in his arms, and that he could deal with. He could keep holding on, he didn't have to let go yet. That was all it meant to him for now. His brain wasn't quite ready to assimilate the rest of it yet.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji laughed a little breathlessly as the elevator pinged and he dragged Kippei out onto the rooftop toward the portal, waving to the clock man who just rolled his eyes at him.

"You're late, Ibu Shinji."

"Mmm...not by much?" He flipped the guy off and took a deep breath before kissing Kippei on the cheek quickly.

"...I'll se you on the other side!" And he stepped through, coughing and feeling queazy when he emerged in first realm, wishing he could go back because he always felt better in Second Realm. But Kippei was coming, so he turned around and waited, a little impatiently.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei eyed the thing warily as Shinji disappeared, not at all convinced that it was really going to work and not kill him in the process. But Shinji having gone through was a powerful motivator, and so he took a deep breath and squared his shoulders before he walked through.

It...kind of hurt. A lot. Pressure and squeezing, pushing from all sides, wrenching, as if his insides were getting scrambled up and he didn't really want to think about the mechanics of this. He stumbled out on the other side and bent over, leaning his hands on his knees and trying not to gag, praying for his stomach to settle back into it's usual place. After a minute he straightened up, and looked for Shinji, giving him a crooked smile.

"Hell of a ride you've got there," he commented.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji wandered over and kissed his cheek, a little upset at the thought that it might have hurt Kippei. He really hadn't thought of that before.

"Are you okay?" He asked softly, looking around as the doctors started coming over to tell him he was late, and yeah duh he knew that and no he didn't feel sick and yes he was sure he was fine and no he didn't want to lie down and yes this was his boyfriend who he kept talking about and no he didn't need a medical checkup and yes he just wanted to go home thank you very much. Shinji sighed with relief as the little whirlwind of people left him to it.

"You're okay?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, I'm okay," Kippei told him, standing a little straighter and refusing to look shaken in front of the stupid doctors. He didn't really trust them... maybe they did some good, but they took Shinji away from him all the time, even if it wasn't their fault. He didn't like them. And he wasn't going to look like a weak human in front of them, even if he was.

"We can go now?" he asked warily, looking at the retreating forms of all the people who acted so concerned about Shinji. As if they cared, really.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji nodded, a little amused by Kippei's growly face. He wound their fingers together and fished his sunglasses out of his bag, putting them on and tugging Kippei out of the gate complex.

"This is First Realm...it's just like your world really, we have all the same stuff really. The buildings over there are shops. We're on an island and the rest of the realm doesnt know about the gate so we live here and have everything we need really. And those buildings over there are the dorms, where I live."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei looked around, interestedly...it really did look just like Earth, or Second Realm or whatever the hell they called it. Shops and buildings and everything, nothing really foreign or weird or heavenly, nothing angelic.

"Huh," he said, unable to think of anything intelligent. It was all so surreal. It looked the same, and he could almost believe he hadn't gone anywhere at all, except for that terrible feeling of dislocation when he'd gone through the gate thing. "So this is where you live."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"....yeah..." Shinji wished he could see perfectly, so he could see the look on Kippei's face because it was very hard to tell anything from his voice. Nothing should be really surprising, everything seemed the same to Shinji but maybe he was...literally...blind?

"Are you still okay?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei chuckled a little, tucking Shinji's hand under his arm like they always did. "I'm fine," he answered. "Don't worry." Mostly fine, although he still felt a little bruised and a little queasy and he was sure he'd sleep well tonight, but yeah, he was fine.

"Well, let's see it! Lead the way, babe."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji shrugged and led Kippei down past the shops to the dorms, weaving his way through the little paths to the rooms he shared with Kirihara, who was absent, as usual.

"This is my place...that's Kirihara's room, and this is my room, and we share that bathroom, kitchen and living area...it's not like your place, but that's okay."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"You have your own room," Kippei noted, with some relief. When Shinji had talked about his roommate, Kippei had thought they shared an actual room, something that made him crazy jealous even when he knew better. Best of all, it meant that while he was here he and Shinji could share Shinji's room, and that was even more of a relief. To be with Shinji all the time and yet never have anyplace private was, he was sure, sheer torture.

"It's nice," he decided. It looked clean and comfortable and it was small, but not that much smaller than his own apartment, although he didn't share it with anyone when Shinji wasn't there.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Of course I do..." Shinji blinked at him. What had he thought? That he slept in the same room as a suicidal maniac? Weird. Shinji tugged Kippei into his room and shut the door, just in case Kirihara came home at some point. He looped his arms over to Kippei's shoulders, his smile wide and delighted.

"I didnt have to say goodbye to you...and now I have you in my room....I've had so many dreams like this."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei laughed, low and equally delighted, and leaned down to kiss him softly. "Do they now?" he murmured, his voice soft and husky. "Do you have dreams like this? I wonder what else happens in your dreams?" He bent his head to the side and nipped at Shinji's jaw, letting his tongue trail down the side of Shinji's neck and sucking gently, marking the easily bruised skin.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Mmmm! I have lots of dreams like this but then I always have to wake up and they're not real because you couldn't come here before but you can come here now and it's heaps better and so now maybe I don't have to wake up and you'll still be here..." He groaned softly, feeling the skin bruising and wondering what Kirihara was going to think of his damned sexy boyfriend.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Amused, Kippei lapped briefly at the mark he'd made, nuzzling Shinji's throat and purring deep in his chest. His, Shinji was his, and now they never had to be separated anymore, or at least, not nearly as often. He could come here.

"Oh, you're awake," he assured Shinji in a deep, throaty voice. "We'll just have to make all of your dreams real...and then you'll never have to wake up from them again."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Yeah," Shinji agreed, a silly smile turning up the corners of his mouth. "It's amazing. I didn't really think they would figure it out but they did and now I can stay with you...Do you, I mean...can you have the make your shift so you're at the station when I can be there, and you're off when I have to be here? Can we do that?" It probably wouldn't work some of the time, but surely every now and then it was doable? He would do anything for more time with Kippei.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei sighed, not really in the mood for thinking about it right now, but attempting to do so since Shinji was asking.

"Maybe sometimes," he answered. "Not all the time, because I work two days off and one day on, and you have to go home for how many days?" It was completely different rhythms, and unfortunately there was just no way to make it match up perfectly.

"I really should quit," he muttered. Though it was unlikely he'd find any other job with a better schedule.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"No!" Shinji shook his head wildly. Hell no. "You like your job! And it's not so bad, and your friends are all there and I can come visit you at the station and we can still work it out, I promise. I don't...I don't want you to quit." He frowned and pressed his forehead against Kippei's, thinking.

"You wouldn't smell the same, if you quit."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei smiled wryly. That again. But he did like the job, a lot, couldn't really imagine doing anything else. And while he felt a bit wary about Shinji spending too much time at the station--more for Shinji's sake than any other reason--it was true that Shinji could visit him there, and...maybe they could work it out.

He didn't like thinking about it, all the difficulties they faced just trying to actually, physically be together. Why in the hell would any crazy gods create soulmates that were literally from different worlds? Soulmates that needed each other, in every kind of way; they couldn't live without each other, and they couldn't live together. Why couldn't one of them go to the other world to stay? It seemed not only stupid but cruel. They would make it work somehow, because they had to; but it wasn't going to be easy.

"I won't quit," he agreed quietly. It wasn't like it would make things better if he did, not really.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"...okay," Shinji whispered, kicking off his shoes and feeling a little more like he was 'home', even if it wasn't Kippei's place, which he infinitely prefferred to his own.

"Do you wanna make pancakes with me?" He grinned, not overly serious and yet not really joking. He was always in the mood for pancakes.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"Mmmm," Kippei replied, catching him close and nuzzling him, not really hungry for anything so mundane as food, even if it was Shinji-made pancakes. "Maybe later."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"...okay," was Shinji's easy reply again, smiling and wrapping himself around Kippei, nuzzling back and just enjoying it. He hadn't had to say goodbye. It was one more day he got to keep Kippei.

"I'm gonna keep you forever," he whispered resolutely.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"Forever," Kippei agreed, smiling too as he placed soft feather light kisses all over Shinji's face and neck; but in the back of his mind he wondered, how long was forever? How long did they really have, even now? Shinji seemed to be getting better, but what did that really mean? A few more years? A couple of decades? Could they even hope for a lifetime?

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji sighed in relief, something in him aching to hear that his own obsessive need, which had only gotten worse since Kippei kissed that mark, was not a one-sided thing; that Kippei wanted the same thing.

He sat up suddenly, curious and pulled down his pants, spreading his legs and twisting the skin around, squinting hard at the place the mark supposedly was, but even nearly blind he could tell there was nothing there. Only Kippei could see it. He sighed and flopped back on the bed, a little disappointed. He supposed he got to feel it, Kippei got to see it...that was a fair trade.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei smirked, watching, the mark easily visible to him although he was not trying particularly hard to spot it, and he was the only one, the only one ever, who could see it. Even Shinji couldn't see it, although Kippei wasn't sure if that was just because his eyes weren't good enough yet or if he really never would be able to.

"Mine," he reminded Shinji smugly, leaning down to kiss Shinji's thigh where the mark was. Shinji was his, and the mark was his, and it was the proof that Shinji was his forever. All his.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, yours," Shinji mumbled, amused as he reached up to play with a few of the longer strands of gold hair, which finally looked like a gold smudge on Kippei's blurry head. It made him smile and he let his eyes slide closed, just enjoying the peaceful feeling that sank through him when Kippei kissed the mark; the complete, saturating knowledge that he was tied to Kippei forever and nothing could break that bond, not god or sickness. Not even death.