potg: shinji and kippei

[shattermelt]

Kippei had told Shinji 'tomorrow', but by the time he got off work, early in the morning, he was tired. The rest of his shift had been busy, and he hadn't gotten much sleep. He went home and slept for about six hours, and then he looked at the clock and tried to decide if half a day was better than nothing, or if he should wait and just go in the morning. In the end he decided that there was no reason he couldn't do both, and he really wanted to see Shinji right now.

He spent the whole drive over there telling himself how pathetic he was, and then when he got within sight of the hotel, he suddenly sharply remembered leaving that message for Shinji on his phone. Oh, fuck. That was so embarrassing, he really should have erased it and done something else, Shinji probably thought he was some kind of crazy stalker idiot. Or just stupid. He sighed and parked his bike anyway and went in to ask at the desk for Ibu Shinji.

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[ayretala.livejournal.com]

The phone rang and Shinji sat up blearily, picking it up and staring at his watch, then completely ignoring the person on the other end.

"Oh my god its afternoon I was meant to get up early, you should have rung...oh wait there's a missed call, its probably the wake up call. Damnit, what if he came already? What? There's someone at the desk? ....Has he been there long?"

Shinji hung up and quickly pulled on jeans while his wings were pulling in, wincing at the pain and kicking off the feathers that clung to his skin, stepping out of the soft pile and rummaging around in his bag for a shirt, pulling it on and snatching up his glasses, shoving them on his face and heading downstairs. He got halfway down the corridor and raced back, grabbing his wallet and slipping on some shoes, then running down the hall again. He was impatient as the elevator counted down the floors.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei hadn't been waiting that long at all, but it was okay--on the one hand he wanted desperately to see Shinji again and make sure he hadn't imagined him or something, and on the other hand, he was in no hurry to hear Shinji laugh at him about that ridiculous message. But Shinji had promised not to laugh. Still, Kippei thought glumly, that didn't mean he wouldn't want to. Or that he didn't think Kippei was crazy and weird now.

In spite of which he was relieved to see Shinji come dashing around the corner, and grinned to himself as he went over to meet him.

"Hey," he said. "You look good." Make that smashingly, incredibly good.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Voice; that sexy incredible and just fucking perfect voice. Shinji halted and looked around, frowning, making out the various blurry forms of people and hesitantly reached out, taking a hand and sighing in relief when he immediately recognised it as Kippei's.

"Hey," he murmured softly, a delighted smile blooming because damn he had wanted to see him again so bad. He had listened to the phone message until well into the night, then fallen asleep listening to it again. He couldn't begin to explain why it mattered, but something in Kippei's voice made Shinji feel incredible and he wanted to hear it more. "You look fantastic," Shinji noted, rolling his eyes behind the glasses. But he was secretly happy Kippei thought he looked good.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei chuckled, soft and low, his eyes crinkling with amusement. "You can't see me," he reminded Shinji, nevertheless absurdly pleased to hear him say it. Shinji's hand fit into his as if it had been made for it, and Kippei was weirdly relieved, as if he'd been waiting forever to feel just that, a small slender hand slipping into his.

So screwed, Tachibana, he told himself, and he was still mildly freaked out about this, but he couldn't help himself either. He'd had scant time to do it yesterday, but after he'd dropped Shinji off at his hotel he'd had the entire walk back to the station to think about it, and the realisation that he was suddenly and completely powerless against something like this was unnerving to say the least. He wasn't used to needing anyone, or wanting them so badly that he thought he might do just about anything to have a little more of Shinji's time. It was a little bit terrifying, but when he was with Shinji it seemed so naturally, perfectly right.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Oh really? I could have sworn there was a tall, handsome, dashing man holding my hand. I must have been mistaken," he laughed softly, raising the hand in his to his lips and kissing the knuckles to take out any of the sting that may have been interpreted wrongly. He felt immediately alive, touching Kippei. Completely content, which was a drastic change from his usual depression.

"Can we go somewhere? I don't want to stay in the hotel. Take me somewhere."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei wasn't entirely sure what somewhere was meant to entail, but he didn't want to stay here either, so he nodded, still catching his breath after the electricity of Shinji's lips on his fingers had taken it away.

"Yeah sure," he said finally, clearing his throat and heading for the door, tugging Shinji after him by the hand. He didn't know where they were going yet. Where did you take someone who couldn't see?

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji panicked a little, because they were walking too fast and what if someone walked into him? He tugged on Kippei's hand, then wrapped both of his own around Kippei's elbow, walking a lot closer and feeling more secure in Kippei's shadow. He wondered where they were going but Kippei didn't seem to be forthcoming with any ideas either so Shinji thought about it for a minute.

"Is there an aviary near here?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei slowed down a bit, having forgotten that Shinji might have trouble keeping up. "Um," he said, trying to think, trying not to say, 'a what?' An aviary? Like, birds, okay.

"There's a greenhouse in the gardens?" he offered. "They have birds." Boy did he remember that, because last year when that big storm had brought down a tree on it and took out some of the panes in the roof, a bunch of them had escaped and the director or whatever her title was, the lady in charge had been very upset, her shrill voice echoing around the site as she badgered the captain about their cleanup job.

She wanted them to go bird hunting to try to track them down. The chief had told her to call the zoo, that wasn't their job, for which the entire company had been devoutly grateful. Kippei and his partner Will had exchanged amused glances and Will had done a rather hilarious impression of the hysterical lady, making most of them crack up behind her back. He told Shinji about it on the way there, since it seemed like a decent enough story and somewhat entertaining.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji muffled his laughter in Kippei's sleeve, inhaling the scent of Kippei while he could. Smoke on the water...mmm. He wondered what it was like, being Kippei. He wanted immediately to live with him and spend all his time knowing what it was like instead of just thinking about it, but even if Kippei ever wanted that, it wasn't possible and Shinji cursed himself for being such aweird stalker with stupid ideas.

"You work with a guy called Will? Who else?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"Mmmm, there's five on my team," Kippei told him absently. "The captain and me and Will and two more guys." He didn't really want to talk about work today, which was weird because usually that was all he did, but work was suddenly vastly less interesting than it had been a few days ago. It wasn't like he wanted to quit or anything, but it wasn't the same kind of fascination it had always been.

"So what do you do? Where do you work?" Kippei asked him, thinking regretfully that it was just as well Shinji was from out of town, because if he was here all the time Kippei would never get anything constructive done ever again.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"I told you I don't work. I live in a um...mm I guess its a sort of medical retirement home...sort of. There are only young people there though; I'm one of the oldest. I kind of just...bum around and do whatever I want I guess..." Shinji had never felt so stupid in his life, nor as completely useless. He had barely managed to finish high school, more than a year behind the rest of his class and here Kippei was as captain fireman.

"I guess I'm kind of lame."

[flamefighter.livejournal.com]

Kippei had forgotten about that; he'd assumed that Shinji was one of those children from well off families who just didn't have to, but medical what? He shot Shinji a concerned look.

"That's not lame. You mean like a...a..." He didn't know the word. "Some kind of institute?" Institution, he probably meant, but that didn't sound good, and sanitarium was worse, although it was probably closer. Was it because of his sight, or was there something else? His chest felt tight suddenly, like he couldn't breathe. Didn't that mean you were seriously ill? Like... no, that couldn't be it. "Why?" he asked, swallowing hard and barely noticing that they had arrived.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Oh, that was so not fair. Kippei sighed in resignation, losing the fight with the impulse to just stop and turn and kiss the hell out of him. How was he supposed to help it, anyway, when Shinji kept doing things like that? He wasn't made of stone or anything. Shinji was just purely, unconsciously sexy as hell.

"Okay," he sighed, finally lifting his head with a slow, warm grin. "Now we can go."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji stood perfectly still for the longest time before his fingers came up again to brush against his lips, savouring the tingling sensation. He wished he could see what Kippei's face looked like when he did that but he could hear the grin in Kippei's voice and that was enough.

"Yeah..." Shinji was completely in a daze where nothing existed except Kippei and kisses. "Yeah...we can go now." Was he supposed to be thinking now or what?

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Where were they supposed to be going again? Kippei concentrated for the moment on getting them outside without doing something embarrassing like running into a door. It was the first time in his life he'd ever felt he might actually be in danger of being so wrapped up in someone that he'd be looking at them and not where he was going and accidentally do something that stupid. Shinji was just that hard to take his eyes off of, and every time he managed it, he found them straying back in Shinji's direction at every opportunity.

"Hot chocolate," he reminded himself. "Right. This way," he said, getting his bearings finally and heading for the nearest cafe. He tucked Shinji in safely against his side, glancing down every few steps to marvel at the fact that he was real and there and just wow. Yeah, this would take some getting used to.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji was more than a little amused at himself. Not only did he want desperately to be right where he was, but he also felt no fear walking with Kippei. Usually he was afraid people would run into him or he would walk into a pole, or into the street like yesterday, but with Kippei it didn't feel like anything like that could actually happen. Not while Kippei was holding him. At the same time, Shinji was so acutely aware Kippei was holding him that he felt terrible. He wanted to see, perfectly, just like everybody else and not have to lean on Kippei. He must seem like such a weird flakey idiot, not even able to walk properly by himself.

"Do you even like hot chocolate?" It occurred, rather belatedly, to Shinji that maybe Kippei didn't.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"Of course," Kippei answered contentedly, because really who didn't like hot chocolate, and even if he didn't, he would still want to go get some with Shinji. He looked down again and smiled faintly, a bit wonderingly, not quite over his shock from yesterday that this gorgeous young man apparently liked him as much he liked Shinji. Seemingly, wanted to be with him just as much; or not quite as much, because Kippei couldn't imagine anyone wanting anything as much as he wanted Shinji. But still, Shinji had asked him out. Pretty much.

Kippei was used to people asking him out, but usually he was the one doing the asking, and somehow it was still amazing that someone like Shinji wanted to go out with him. Shinji was not the usual type that was attracted to him at all--Kippei had gone out with a lot of the fun-loving, cheerful, outgoing types, but this was something new.

"I like whatever you like," he added, and dammit, there was his tongue saying sappy things without his permission again. He was pretty resigned to it by this time, and even wryly amused, so he allowed himself the distraction of brushing a quick kiss on Shinji's hair.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji frowned, feeling a little isolated by the comment. It sounded like Kippei was just agreeing with him; would just agree with him and Shinji felt as if it was just because...well, it was like Kippei just didn't want to upset the blind person. Like Shinji would know if Kippei secretly ordered a coffee instead...well, he would smell it but that was so not the point. He pulled away a little, inexplicably frustrated.

"I don't want you to like things just because I do."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei looked down at him, slightly taken aback. Okay? He shrugged. "Well... it's not like that exactly," he admitted. "I like doing things with you, I like things that you like just because you like them, not necessarily for me. Like, even if I didn't like hot chocolate, I would still like going with you to get some. But I do like it, too. I just meant... I like you liking things." Which sounded really stupid and okay, he was just going to shut up now. He shrugged again, awkwardly. Really had to find a way to stop with the sap stuff.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji frowned still, staring at the ground which he couldnt actually see and holding tight to Kippei's sleeve, finding that he tugged himself slowly closer, back to Kippei, terrified of what he might be about to walk into without any warning. God, if he walked into a pole would it break his skull? Thinking similarly delightful thoughts, Shinji was soon clinging to Kippei again as they neared the coffee shop, feeling thoroghly stupid for terrifying himself with what ifs.

:I'll know if you dont get hot chocolate," Shinji warned. "I'll smell it."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei was amused. "I know you would." It wasn't like he was underestimating him or anything. The fact that he couldn't see made Kippei feel an odd sense of loss, but it wasn't like he thought it made Shinji any less sharp in his other senses.

"I like hot chocolate, Shinji," Kippei assured him. "With whipped cream on top. You like it that way?"

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"No," Shinji scrunched his nose at the thought, then laughed because that was neat; that they both liked hot chocolate but different ways. Then he smiled at the mix of aromas.

"I like it with marshmallows. Is there an outdoor area? Can we sit outside? It's nice today..."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, there is," Kippei confirmed, one of the reasons he'd picked this cafe in the first place. The sound of Shinji's laughter was still ringing in his ears, a pleasant shivery feeling. He wanted to hear that a lot more often.

"Marshmallows are irritating," he told Shinji, amused by their different tastes. "They get in the way and get stuck to my nose."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"On your..." Shinji couldn't help it, he lost it completely, laughing so hard his ribs ached and his eyes watered. He was just grateful his hair could hide most of his face when he doubled over, laughing hard and bright. When he at last straightened he was immediately composed, as if nothing at all had happened.

"You're weird." But he smiled as he said it, because it wasn't a bad thing at all.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei made sure Shinji got safely back to his hotel, and kissed him goodbye, lingering and slow, because Shinji was going home, was leaving, and god knew when he'd see him again. He'd programmed his number into Shinji's phone and said, call me when you get here. Then he found his bike where he'd left it, parked in front of the hotel, and tore off for home at a speed that was way more than most people considered safe.

He made himself wait until he was safely inside with the door shut behind him, and then he went and sat on the couch; the closest seat available. He was already holding his phone, though he didn't remember taking it out of his pocket. He opened it and punched up Shinji's message, noting ruefully that his hands were shaking. Stupid. Whatever. He took a deep breath and pressed play.

And there was... singing. Shinji was singing for him. God. A crazy silly smile spread across his face, and he cradled the phone to his ear, listening intently. He smiled wider when he recognized the song, grinning until he felt like it would split his face. Blind Love... so he wasn't the only sappy one, apparently.

The song ended, and Kippei felt a slight twinge of regret, but then Shinji was speaking--a soft short sentence that made his heart stop and he wondered if he'd imagined it. I'm blind but I think I know what love is.

Kippei laughed, a shaky sound, although he felt absurdly like crying. I think I know what love is. Yeah, me too. And wasn't that just a punch in the gut. I think I'm in love with you. Holy shit.

He fell back on the couch, laying on his back and pressing the replay button. He listened to the message again, and again, and again, until he fell asleep, laying there on the couch with Shinji's voice echoing in his dreams. I'm in love with you too.