reforged sword

"You slept in the closet with me..." Shinji whispered once he knew Kippei was awake, a little awed. He was still amazed Kippei hadn't just told him to clean up the mess he had made in the closet, instead he had climbed in and slept there, just to sleep with him. It made Shinji smile in the dark where Kippei couldn't see it. He put his hand over Kippei's and stroked down his arm soothingly.

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"My bed was empty," Kippei grumbled softly, wrapping tighter around him and burying his face in Shinji's hair. "Don't go away like that, it's scary." Or something. Okay, so he wasn't completely awake yet. "My Shinji. You said I could keep you."

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"I only went to the closet," Shinji grumbled, because it wasn't like he had left or as if he had anywhere he could go anyway. But it felt good to have Kippei there, warm and wrapped around him, wanting him there.

"You get to keep me for as long as you want," Shinji confirmed quietly.

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Kippei sighed, because Shinji kept saying that but it still felt like he only had barely a grip on him, no matter how tight he held on.

"Forever," he reminded Shinji impatiently, wondering what he had to do to get that through Shinji's stubborn head. "For someone as old as you, you sure have a damn short memory." Because they had so fucking talked about all of this before - well, except for the part about Shinji wanting to be on top, which had come out of fucking nowhere.

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Shinji hummed in agreement, still feeling lethargic and more than happy to just go back to sleep with Kippei and ignore the world.

"I like your closet...there's no clocks or anything." No time; no sunrise or sunset or anything. "It's just us."

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Kippei sighed and checked his watch. Unfortunately, that wasn't entirely true. Still, he didn't have to go immediately.

"Assuming we didn't have to eat and my sister didn't sell the house, I suppose we could stay in here forever," Kippei agreed, a little amused by the idea. Actually, that probably wasn't true, because the people who worked for him would track him down if they didn't get paid.

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Shinji grinned, turning around amongst the cushions and wrapping himself around Kippei, hands sinking into his hair and drawing him close for a soft kiss.

"I don't need to eat...I don't think. I just like to..."

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Kippei raised his eyebrows at that interesting bit of information. "Well," he muttered, "I, unfortunately, need to, so we will have to move at some point." But not just yet. He felt lazy and relaxed, and just slowly ran his hands through Shinji's hair over and over, pleased that whatever the hell had set Shinji off last night appeared to not be a problem at the moment and Shinji was no longer mad at him. While it was true that he liked making Shinji mad, he did not enjoy having Shinji sulking because his feelings were hurt. It was a pretty fine line sometimes.

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Shinji sighed heavily because yeah...Kippei needed to eat, and work and do human things even if Shinji didn't really have to, he just usually liked to. But today he didn't want to be a human, he wanted to be exactly what he was.

"Okay...I'm not gonna be home tonight."

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Kippei blinked at him, and then frowned a little. "You...aren't?" Of course, that was fine, Shinji could do whatever the hell he wanted to; just because he lived here didn't mean he'd be here all the time, but it was weird and Kippei wanted to know where he was going and why and... well, it was none of his business, really. Still, he felt disappointed and he didn't really want to analyse why, so he shrugged and looked away.

"Sure, that's fine." Ugh, sleeping alone again. Maybe he'd just get good and drunk first.

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Shinji winced at the tone of Kippei's voice, but he didn't bother trying to explain. He wanted to go home, and be with demons and get treated like normal and just...be around things like him. And he wasn't stupid enough to think he would get away again for a while once he got there. But that disappointed tone hurt almost as much as Kippei lying about it and shrugging it off like it was nothing. Sure, it was fine. Not.

"...'m sorry."

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Kippei shrugged again and went back to exploring Shinji's body with his hands, kissing his neck to distract him, too, refusing to think about it any more or ask questions. Shinji could do whatever he wanted to, and Kippei wasn't going to try to keep him locked up here no matter how much he liked the idea.

He entertained it in the back of his mind for a bit anyway, the thought of keeping Shinji in the closet, here, in his little nest and not letting him leave. He wouldn't really do it, but it was a nice thought.

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Shinji felt wretched and didn't know what to do. They kept fighting and he had no idea how to make a human happy, and he was supposedly living here now and the only place he could retreat to was the closet. He felt rather stupid right then and sighed, wrapping arms and legs tight around Kippei and kissing his throat, over and over until the skin bruised under his mouth.

"You haven't changed your mind, right?"

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"No!" Kippei answered, exasperated. "I haven't and I won't. What the hell are you so afraid of, you're the one who's going to change your mind." Shinji kept freaking out about things that Kippei had no idea why they bothered him. He didn't even know why Shinji had decided he wanted to hide in the closet tonight.

"You're the only one I ever want," he mumbled, pulling Shinji tighter against him and groaning a little as Shinji's mouth left marks on his throat, sharp teeth just barely felt. He shuddered, getting turned on all over again. He hated it when good sex got interrupted by stupid drama, but he wasn't sure now was a good time to finish what they'd started.

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Shinji glared darkly, but his body was responding to Kippei anyway. "Stop blaming everything on me! I'm never gonna change my mind!" He rubbed against Kippei, groaning at the heat pooling in his groin as his teeth searched out the chain around Kippei's neck, finding the crest and biting down on it to stop from hurting Kippei.

"So say you love me!" He didn't get why it was so hard to say I love you, when he'd just said he would only ever want him. But humans were apparently incapable of loving demons.

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Kippei blinked at him. "That's what this is about?" God, what the hell. Shinji was such a fucking girl. He thought about it, or tried to when Shinji was squirming against him like that.

"It's wrong," he said finally, unable to put his thoughts into any more order than that. "She's wrong. I can't be in love with you, you're not a girl. It doesn't work like that." It was just such a weird idea. He'd been forced to admit he wanted him, needed him even, but love? That was just crazy. Still, it obviously hurt Shinji's feelings, and hell, if he was going to act like a girl then maybe it would be okay....

"I don't know," he said finally, rolling over and pinning Shinji down to kiss him deeply. "I don't know if that's what it is, and I'm not going to say it when I don't know. I just need you and you can't go away, okay?" He held on tight, a little desperately, wishing Shinji would just understand.

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Shinji stared at him, hating that he had made Kippei sad, but feeling small and a little dead inside. His fingers clutched the crest and he wondered, again, what had possessed him, but he already knew. Even if humans couldn't love demons...demons could somehow still love humans.

"...okay," he whispered a little brokenly, not able to say anything else. He understood enough. "I won't go away," he promised, letting his body have it's way, pushing up against Kippei's weight, rubbing desperately, needing more friction. Anything to make him forget.

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Kippei groaned, because obviously it wasn't fucking okay. He pulled away a little, holding Shinji still and staring down at him, breathing hard and trying to control himself long enough to think.

"It's not okay," he growled, frustrated. "How can you be in love with me?" That didn't make sense either; he didn't quite believe it. "I mean, it's fine, I just..." he swallowed hard, forcing himself to examine his own feelings. "Annie thinks I'm in love with you," he admitted, "but it doesn't make sense. It's not supposed to work that way," he pleaded, feeling daunted by the enormity of the shift in his worldview it would require to admit it.

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"....Annie's not hiding in the closet trying to have sex with me," Shinji pointed out. "Which is good, because I'm not in love with Annie..." He sighed, frustrated in more ways than one now. "It's fine. I'm not going anywhere. You don't have to love me...like you said...I do. That's enough. I'm staying til you tell me I can't no more, and you said you're never saying that, so it's good...can I please get some now? You're so annoying, you always wanna talk at the worst times!" And no he couldn't say hypocrite, damnit.

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