potg: shinji and kippei

[shattermelt]

Kippei had spent a great deal of time in Shinji's room at the hotel lately. The last few times Shinji had been here, he hadn't been able to go anywhere, but Kippei hadn't minded too much. As long as they were together, that was the important thing. But Shinji still had to go back to his own world every few days, and Kippei spent the time between visits at loose ends, too distracted to do anything useful with himself. He missed Shinji fiercely any time that he was gone, and as time went on, it only seemed to get worse. Even a day or two seemed excruciating, and he wondered how he had ever made it through the long time after Shinji had almost died and Kippei hadn't known when or even if he was coming back at all.

But Shinji was due back today, so Kippei was at the hotel as soon as he could reasonably expect Shinji to be there. He called Shinji from the lobby, needing his current room number and honestly, just needing to hear his voice as soon as he could.

"Hey, beautiful," he said when Shinji answered. "How's my angel?"

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[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"I'm coming down, wait for me." Shinji hung up and pushed his glasses up on his nose, settling his backpack on his shoulders before feeling his way down the hallway to the lift, someone stopping his hand and politely asking what floor he wanted. Shinji told them but didn't say anything else, too focussed on getting there and being able to go home. Because he finally had permission, to not just leave the hotel, but to go wherever he wanted as long as he kept the tracker on. That was easy. The lift bell tinged and he stepped out, hearing the muted hustle and bustle of the lobby and just waiting, confident Kippei would find him.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei closed his phone, amused that Shinji had not answered his question, but relieved by what the response apparently meant--Shinji was able to leave now, ready to go out and maybe even go home. Kippei could not help the way his pulse picked up and a subtle thrill ran through him. Home. It wasn't home when Shinji wasn't there.

He waited patiently near the elevator for Shinji to appear, annoyed with every single person who got off that wasn't Shinji, until he finally spotted Shinji's slim graceful figure with a bag on his shoulder and glasses perched on his nose, obvioiusly ready to go. Home home home. Kippei ignored the delighted little song in the back of his mind, moving quickly over and calling his name as he approached, taking Shinji's arm immediately and pulling him into a giant hug.

"I missed you so much," he murmured, like always.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Mmm..." Shinji smiled against Kippei's shirt, the startled reaction to Kippei's grab settling into a pleasant thrill that Kippei was there and holding him and he didn't give a damn what anyone else thought about them hugging in the hotel lobby because it wasn't like he could see them anyway.

"I missed you too." He untangle himself and wrapped both arms around one of Kippei's, pressed in close against Kippei's side.

"Take me home?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"God yes," Kippei sighed, more than ready to do just that. He'd been waiting, ever since he knew Shinji was coming back, to take him really home. Home that wasn't without him.

"Right now," he agree. "Come on." He kissed the top of Shinji's head and let Shinji cling to his arm, although he'd much rather have had his own arm still wrapped securely around Shinji's shoulders. He'd gathered, though, that this made Shinji uncomfortable, so he refrained.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji couldn't stop smiling because they were going home and he would get to have the whole three days with Kippei. It was Shinji's idea of heaven. He felt ridiculously proud, walking out of the hotel with Kippei on his arm...or really, on Kippei's arm, but that was a bit of a necessity.

"What did you do without me?" Shinj was genuinely curious, since he had been put to bed and told in no uncertain terms to stay there.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei shrugged wryly and held Shinji's arm a little tighter. "Nothing much," he answered, although the truth was 'nothing at all'. "Rode my bike a little and got drunk a few times and missed you like crazy." Pretty much what he'd done, along with a few other things, while Shinji had been gone and gone and gone and he hadn't heard anything.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji laughed, imagining Kippei drunk and riding his bike singing mopey love songs, far from what he knew really happened but still damn amusing. He tilted his head to hear more of what was going on around them, picking up on most of he footsteps but still feeling swamped in noise. He couldn't wait to get home where it was just the two of them.

"Are we taking the bike home?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

The sound of Shinji's laughter floated warm and unexpected in the air, and Kippei glanced over in some wonder, always amazed by how the somewhat rare sound affected him. He'd made Shinji laugh, and it made ridiculous effervescent warmth ripple through him like a tide. He hadn't even been working for it this time.

"Is that okay?" Kippei asked, tilting his head in question. "We can walk if you want to." It honestly didn't matter to him; as badly as he wanted to have Shinji home again, he was entirely content to just be with him anywhere he was, walking or riding or sitting on a bench on some street corner.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"I want to ride," Shinji replied immediately. "It's like flying." He hadn't been sure he liked it that first time, but the longer he went after without it the more he wanted to go again until he knew he wanted to.

"Tell me about the bike? What colour is it? And what model? How old is it? Have you ever scratched it?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Well that was true enough. It was like flying. Though Kippei realised suddenly that Shinji probably meant actual, literal flying, like with wings, and it stunned him briefly. He could barely even imagine that, Shinji with his wings spread flying through the air. He wished he could ask Shinji to take him flying, he badly wanted to know what it was like, but he didn't think Shinji would be able to take him, not when he was sick and maybe not ever. He wouldn't ask.

"It's black," he said absently, duh, and started telling Shinji all about the bike, gradually shaking off his melancholy and warming to the enthusiasm of describing his baby. This was one thing he could describe perfectly.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Black and Kippei was able to describe it in more detail than Shinji had ever heard him speak about anything. Shinji listened to the lilt and lull of his voice and felt almost hypnotised, having no idea where they were or what was happening, knowing only the sound of Kippei's voice. But then they were at the bike and Shinji ran a hand over the seat as if he knew it as intimately as Kippei had described it and he almost felt he did. He felt around for helmets but couldn't find it, so he just waited expectantly, wondering if Kippei had learnt his lesson yet.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei watched as Shinji caressed the bike, just briefly but lust hit him hard like a punch in the gut; his breath came out in a rush and he shuddered. Goddamn, Shinji was beautiful and he was so going to hell, if there was a hell, but he couldn't help himself. He picked Shinji up and set him on the bike, straddling it, and then leaned in to kiss him, quick and rough and fierce. He didn't even have words, just a mad swirl of emotion.

Tearing himself away from the kiss before he got lost in it, he climbed on in front of Shinji and started the bike up, the roar of the engine covering the roaring in his ears and the pounding of his blood. It did nothing at all to disguise the heat of Shinji pressed against his back.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Startled, Shinji had no time to recover from the kiss before Kippei was sitting in front of him and the bike was lurching to life between his legs. Shit. Kippei hadn't learnt his lesson. Shinji would have to give him a helmets lecture before he went back to First Realm again, but not til later because Shinji's lips were still tingling pleasantly and he just wanted to wrap his arms around Kippei's waist, lean his head against the broad back and feel the wind, buffered by Kippei. So that was what he did. All the way home, the wind whipping around Kippei to slap at Shinji's sides and he just hugged Kippei tighter and imagined he was flying, like he had when he was young. And even better...flying with Kippei.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei felt more like he was flying than ever, riding the rushing current of his pulse as much as the bike beneath him. He had Shinji behind him and the bike throbbing under him and they were flying and it was the most beautiful thing in the world. It more than made up for the empty, colorless, lifeless days when Shinji was gone.

When they got home he pulled up almost reluctantly, getting off and lifting Shinji down after, stopping to pull him hard against him and kiss him again, longer and deeper until he had to let go, laughing in breathless exhilaration.

"I'm so glad you're home."

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Me too," Shinji mumbled against Kippei's lips, unable to stop smiling. "I feel better here." It was an admonission he didn't make easily, because he didn't want to jinx it, but it was true. Being here, with Kippei, was the only place that made him feel complete and as if he could get better. If he could trade his wings for this, he wouldn't have to think for a second.

"Come on!" He grabbed Kippei's hand and dragged him up the path, careful to count his steps and taking the stairs more slowly, because if he tripped and hurt himself now it would be too fucking ironic. But then he was inside, shutting the door and pushing Kippei up against it and kissing him, sliding his tongue in that warm, wet mouth and exploring.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Shinji felt better here, and there was nothing Kippei wanted to hear more in the world. He followed Shinji carefully, keeping a close watch on him partly out of caution because Shinji was in a hurry, and partly because taking his eyes off of Shinji was damn hard. Then Shinji was kissing him back, eager and inquisitive and so fucking hot. Kippei groaned and tried desperately not to hold on too tight.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"Shhh..." Shinji smiled affectionately, brushing long blonde strands away fm Kippei's face, feeling out the familiar lines of that beautiful face. "I'm not made of glass Kii." Not quite anyway. He didn't want Kippei holding back and trying not to hurt him and being hesitant as a result. He wanted things the way they always had been; for things not to change just because Kippei knew the truth.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei laughed a little, helpless and breathless and just, god. He leaned his head back against the door, feeling the soft searching touch of Shinji's fingers on his face and just aching.

"You've always been made of glass, baby," he said softly. He'd always known that Shinji was easily broken, that Kippei was too big and too strong and he'd always been careful, but he was a little more conscious of it just now. It was less about the angel thing and more about the fact that he'd just seen what kind of damage Shinji could do to himself, that he'd nearly died and been confined to bed for weeks after that and Kippei couldn't stand to hurt him even a little.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji frowned darkly, not liking Kippei saying that at all. He didn't want Kippei to think he was weak or useless or anything, but that wasn't what Kippei was saying either. He was just being careful. Shinji couldn't blame him for being careful. Though the whole no sex thing was starting to grate on his nerves.

"Can I at least convince you to go to bed with me?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei straightened, relieved that Shinji wasn't going to argue in spite of his frown, and brushed Shinji's cheek before he took off his jacket and threw it over a chair. "Hell yes," he answered, "I thought that was the plan." He grinned and captured Shinji's hand, stopping briefly to take his glasses and leave them on the kitchen table.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Shinji rolled his eyes, more than a little wry, because Kippei had such a thing against those glasses while Shinji liked them. But he didn't mind Kippei taking them away and seeing underneath; it was a small way to let Kippei in. He followed Kippei into the bedroom and kicked off his shoes, which he had forgotten in his haste to kiss Kippei stupid by the front door.

Everything was just where it had been. He counted the exact same steps to the bed and felt his knees brush against it, the smile still playing on his lips.

"You haven't moved anything."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei blinked at him curiously. "Of course not. Then you'd trip over things." He shrugged, uninterested in the question, and picked Shinji up again, tossing him lightly on the bed. He chuckled and kicked his shoes off, losing his shirt as well before he crawled up beside him and took off Shinji's shoes too, throwing them on the floor and then stretching out beside him to kiss him again while his fingers worked their way up under Shinji's shirt.

"Missed you so much," he mumbled again, pressing his face against Shinji's neck.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"I'm home now," Shinji murmered, petting the silky hair and stroking his hand down Kippei's arm. He wrapped his arms tight around Kippei, holding him and just enjoying getting to be close, at home, with Kippei. He shivered, delighted, at the feel of Kippei's hands against his skin, the feeling so familiar and longed for, but somehow new.

"I love you, and I missed you and it feels so damn good to be home again."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei sighed in agreement, relieved to just have Shinji in his arms, warm and real against him. He breathed slowly, in and out, just absorbing Shinji's scent that never lingered long enough after he was gone. His fingers brushed gently at Shinji's skin, moving just enough to caress a little.

"You've been gone a long time," he whispered. Not just the last few days, but a very long time since he'd been here. Home.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

Yeah, he had. Too long. Too long since he felt this damn good. Shinji kissed his way across Kippei's cheek to his mouth and taking his time to nibble his way inside because for once, they had all day. The bed smelt like Kippei; most things here did, which was perfect. Shinji felt surrounded with the person he loved most and wouldn't want to be anywhere else, ever.

"I'm home now," he pointed out again, because maybe Kippei just needed to be reminded like fifty times or maybe he just liked to hear it.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei laughed, a soft, rumbly chuckle. He could hear in Shinji's voice the tone that meant he was humoring Kippei by giving him the same response as many times as he needed it--but it hadn't been the same statement.

"A long time," he repeated, nuzzling Shinji's hair. "You almost died, Shinji," he added softly. "Don't be doing that again." Not before you have to, not like that.

[ayretala.livejournal.com]

"I won't," Shinji whispered, because he had learnt his lesson. Kippei was not fine, after. He didn't move on, not that he got the chance to but Shinji knew now that he wouldn't. If he died then Kippei would die inside and he couldn't let that happen. He let Kippei love him, and now he had to live to make sure it stayed that way. He wrapped his arms tighter around Kippei, nuzzling against his throat.

"I won't go. I won't let go of you."

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Kippei relaxed, finally completely relieved of the worry and tension. "Good," he answered, smiling. He propped himself up on one elbow to study Shinji's face, tracing it with his fingers the way that Shinji did to his, then closing his eyes with a frown of concentration on his face as he wondered what it was like to know someone only by touch. He thought Shinji was just as beautiful that way as any other, really.

"I can 'see' you," he murmured, the faint smile curving up again.

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

Shinji frowned because of course Kippei could see him; he could see, period. But he reached out and touched lightly and realised Kippei had his eyes closed and a bright smile blossomed, laughter spilling off his tongue because damn, that was pretty cool.

"Mmm. It's not so bad. It would be worse if I could see you but couldn't hear you. My hands can see for me, but they don't hear for me."

Kippei opened his eyes again, wanting to see the laughter on Shinji's face, and he smiled wryly. It was true that it must be worse not to be able to hear, but he was personally very grateful that he could see. To never have seen Shinji seemed to him a great tragedy. Then again, not hearing Shinji's laughter would be terribly sad, too.

"Don't stop," he murmured, tracing Shinji's smile with his finger.

Shinji just laughed harder, wrapping a hand around his ribs when they ached in a good way from it, eyes bright and delighted.

"Don't stop laughing, or don't stop smiling?" He asked when his laughter finally settled into sporadic chuckles, smiled still plastered on his face. "I'll always smile for you stupid."

Kippei chuckled, rolling over onto his back and tugging Shinji over on top of him. Yeah, that was better, sprawled out on his back with Shinji draped over him like a blanket. A really light blanket that fit against him just perfectly, and Kippei pushed both hands beneath Shinji's shirt and placed them on his back, feeling the warmth of his skin and the steady beat of his heart and the way his chest rose and fell as he breathed.

"Mmmmm you feel good." Small and light and perfect and just god, so good.

"So do you," Shinji murmered in reply, sighing as he relaxed into it. "Move your hands." He shifted before Kippei could answer, Arching his back a little and closing his eyes at the sting before his wings blossomed from between his shoulders. It faded soon enough and he relaxed again, feeling more comfortable somehow. He didn't need to hide anything from Kippei, not even his useless dark wings.

Kippei's hands slipped down as Shinji arched his back, uncertain at first what he was doing, and then the wings unfurled and he smiled faintly, wrapping his arms loosely around Shinji's waist and sighing in contentment as Shinji relaxed again. Kippei had no idea what he'd ever done to deserve being loved by an angel, but he'd do anything he had to do to be able to hold on like this forever.

As long as their forever could be, anyway. "Are you comfortable?"

[shattermelt.livejournal.com]

"Mmhmm," Shinji hummed lightly, cuddling against Kippei, letting his wings sprawl out across the bed, covering them as effectively as the blanket Shinji tangled his legs in. Really, it was a pretty silly question since if he wasn't comfortable he would have moved until he was, and Kippei should have known that if Shinji was lying on him then he was just about as comfortable as it as possible to get.

"Is this okay?" Because maybe Kippei wasn't comfortable.

"Perfect," Kippei assured him, kissing his hair in apology for worrying about manhandling him around like that. It was nice that Shinji enjoyed this as much as he did, just laying here on top of him, fit together like pieces of a puzzle, fitting perfect and seamless and he never wanted to move again. At least not for awhile.

"Never moving ever again," he informed Shinji anyway, teasing a little.

"S'good, coz I'm not goin anywhere," Shinji mumbled around a yawn, wishing he had thought to take off all of Kippei's clothes before they got on the bed, but then he supposed he would be pretty unlikely to actually sleep, which he really wanted to do. If he slept now he would be more awake and stay that way for longer, and hopefully get to spend more time with Kippei in the land of the non-dreaming.

"Wake me up when you wake up."

Kippei chuckled at him. "I'm not sleeping yet, but I'll wake you up later." He wasn't tired and he didn't want to miss this, the relief and comfort of finally having Shinji right back where he wanted him, letting the rightness of it soak so deeply into his bones that he remembered it even when Shinji had to go again. Plenty of time to sleep then. For now he wanted to just lay here and revel in the feeling of Shinji being so definitely present, solidly here and warm against him, wrapped around him. Relaxed and beautiful and his. Yeah, perfect.